Success, money, dreams and plans are three subjects that are most talked about in our house right now. 2018 was always going to be a big, scary, exciting month for us and 4 months in it’s all those things and more. When we geared ourselves up for a big renovation project and a wedding abroad, the picture didn’t include me swapping my safe and cosy office job for the big bad world of self employment, but hey ho, here we are! While I’ve loved every minute of it so far, it was undeniably the worst timing.
The last couple of months have been an emotional rollercoaster that has seen us having to constant adjust to an ever-changing situation. There have been tears, high fives, compromise and a whole lot of propping each other up (mentally…and sometime physically when there’s nothing else for it but gin!). I started the year with a very clear goal of where I wanted my new business to go and the timeframe I wanted to hit a series of smaller milestones I set myself. But over the last couple of months I’ve had to bend, re-prioritize and change my perspective of what success looks like at a time when circumstances might be out of our hands. Because sometimes, things just don’t go to plan.
As anyone who’s had their goals de-railed knows, you can either sink or swim. You have to regroup and go back to the drawing board. For me, this came one Thursday evening when I had just got back from an overnight stay in London when I had 6 meetings, 3 shoots and an event. I had missed the deadline to pay our wedding caterers and had 5 missed calls from our builder. I felt completely overwhelmed, exhausted and you know that multi-tasking thing us women are supposed to be total bosses at? Yeah, I was failing at that big time. So it was time to give in and temporarily stop being everything all at once. As my husband-to-be said “success isn’t defined by pound signs and awards” and he’s completely right.
successsəkˈsɛs/nounThe accomplishment of an aim or purpose.
Success is something I’ve always measured by opportunities, career progression and a little something to keep Mango and Zara in business! But there’s nothing like a change in circumstances to make you change your perspective and prioritise other areas in your life. I had to bend. I had to redefine what success looked like for me. Even if it was temporary. So, while it may not be plan A, or even plan B, for me, success is now creating a life that’s manageable, healthy and happy. It’s simplified without pressure.
While it’s important to have dreams and goals in both your professional and personal life, they shouldn’t be so rigid that anything less is deemed a failure. Otherwise, we’re going to be failing a lot! And that’s fine, it’s how we learn, but things change, they may even stall for a while, it doesn’t mean they will stay like that and perhaps it will present different opportunities you never thought of before. Ultimately, you have to re-evaluate what success means to you. Is it a big house? A happy relationship? Inner peace? Being content in your life?
While mine used to be having a Pinterest-worthy house, a nice car and a successful business, it’s less about materialistic measures and more about being healthy, content and happy within what I have achieved and be patient with what’s to come. While I still believe we’re total girl bosses and have the ability to rock every area of our life, we’re still only human and sometimes we need to put ourselves, our health and our loved ones before taking over the world. Just for a minute…
Photos by Nargis Cross